Hi
welcome to Dr. Odd's Cribs - Be sure to click on
the pictures for the full size photo.
Three
Bedroom house
Chandler, AZ
Hi,
I am Joe and this is Jen and welcome to our crib!
The
front door.� And here we meet the star of the show, Addie
dog.� Pretty much anything
you see of any artistic flavor or beauty is attributable to
my wife Jen, I had nothing to do with any of it.�
Even the door, she came up with the door design.�
On the wall is a picture we got in Hawaii,
we like to swim with Sea Turtles.
Just
inside the front door is office #1.� Again, heeeere�s Addie dog.� Not much else going on here,
that is my stereo and desk from college because I am
too cheap to buy new stuff.�
Jen is forcing the issue though and by 2006 this room
will be totally different, assuming we still live here.
This
is the downstairs bathroom, and here we meet Bodhi cat.� Bodhi is short for Bodhisattva which is a Buddhist
term for an enlightened being who has chosen to forego enlightenment
until all beings can join the party.�
Actually, he is dumber than the toilet he is sitting
on, but he teaches us to relax and just watch the show of life,
rather than getting all mixed up in it, so maybe he is a Bodhisattva
after all.
Oops!�
Sorry Bodhi cat, just trying to take a picture of your
special place, we really could�ve gone without the demo.
If
you haven�t noticed yet, the joint is kind of a zoo.� Here are the fish,
there is another fish in the kitchen.�
I used to have saltwater fish but they all croaked and
took way too much effort.� These
are the goldfish, I feed them and clean
the filter every other month.� I�m into low maintenance,
Jen is the best example of that.�
Again, the plants are Jen�s, but the animals knock them
over and pretend to eat them.
Here
is the pool room.� I suck.�
My Dad and I are playing
first one to 100, the loser buys Fleming�s
(an awesome local restaurant).�
The current score on the board is:
Big Jer: 72
Joey:
71
I�m
going to let him win so he feels bad and ends up paying anyway.�
There is the dog door, although we learned this morning
that if it happens to be sprinkling out, Princess Addie will
refuse to go outside, and moves his bowels in the house.� Talk about a rude awakening.� Addie said, �It�s bad enough you make me poo poo outside in front of everyone,
you expect me to do it in the rain, too?� F you, here�s a stink bomb for the rug.�� Notice the freshly mowed carpeting in front
of the pool table?� Yup,
the location of the deuce.�
Good
thing we live in Arizona
and it only rains once every other year.
This
is the kitchen.� I used
to cook a lot of really good food here, I�m known as the Drunk
Chef because I open a bottle of wine and Jen drinks � a glass
and I have the rest while I am cooking, so I am usually lit
up by the time we sit down to eat.�
My parents got us the kitchen table, we love it, thanks Mom and Dad!� Now I am in school so I don�t get to cook, we
eat oatmeal now.� On the
table is my new puter, I love it and I am typing on it right now.� The Faux painting was done by Jen�s good friend,
Autumn, if you live in Arizona
she does it professionally.�
Or, if you have a really big job, she travels.�
Addie dog is playing the Where�s Waldo game,
see if you can find her!
Here
is our wine �fridge with a picture of me on the front.�
The �fridge is full so come on over for dinner and
games!� Notice the pile
of crap on the top.� This
is what is commonly known as a �Jen Pile�.�
Jen leaves her crap all over the place, and this is
the cr�me de la cr�me Jen pile.�
I have had to adjust my OCD and AR tendencies to be
able to tolerate this, but she is low maintenance so I let
it go.
This
is the entertainment area.� The speaker on the right is the one Jen threw
the dog rope into cuz she is cute but has very little coordination.� Fellas, if you want to keep nice stuff around,
don�t get married.� On
top of the center channel is a picture of Jen on her horse,
that is the only animal of Zoo DeNicholas that doesn�t
live with us (yet).�
We
went upstairs now.� Here
is office #2.� There is
where I work when I am doing stuff for my job.�
What�s in the tank, you ask?�
A 6 foot Boa Constrictor that my wife accidentally smuggled
into this country from Mexico.� I claim it is the only illegal thing she has
ever done and still feels terrible about it.�
No, she never drank under 21 and never took a hit off
a�� Anyways, I�m hoping one day we open up all the
tanks and let nature take its course.�
The cat will eat the fish, the snake will eat the cat,
and Addie dog will take care of the snake.�
Then I will be left with only my dog which is the way
I wanted it in the first place.
Smile
Addie!� We skipped over
two bedrooms and a bathroom, but who cares, they are for storage
anyway until we get a chitlin� in the oven (still practicing).� That brings us to the palace of love, our bedroom.�
Addie is pissed cuz the flash is too bright.�
There is the elephant painting Jen got me cuz they are
my favorite animal.� Jen is mad because I didn�t make the bed, but
this is the real deal Holyfield.� We are both in school and working engineers,
no time to make the bed.
Good
girl Addie, you can move now.� Man, I trained that dog well.� Here is the bedroom from the other direction,
another little entertainment area where Jen goes to watch her
crappy t.v. programs like X files re-runs and CSI (Las Vegas
is best she says, I have no idea what the hell she is talking
about).
Here
is my car, it is my second favorite
�thing�.� We call it
the �smurf-mobile� for obvious reasons.� It goes real fast, but I�ve only received one
citation in almost 2 years, that�s pretty good.�
Third gear is a beast.�
A Jetta tried to race me the other day.� Typically I don�t engage but was slightly insulted
at the assertion, so it didn�t go well for the Jetta.� Jen�s Durango
is at the barn (imagine that!) so no picture of it.
�
Here
is my favorite thing, my bicycle.� Even though I have had over 20 stitches, a minor
concussion, and a severe allergic reaction (from landing in
a cactus), I still love biking.�
Last year we got second place in a race together, not
sure if I�ll be able to race this winter with school taking
up so much time.� Notice
the green horn and shark squeak toy on the handle bars.� Imagine getting passed by a guy with a Krispy Kreme hat taped to his helmet
and kids toys and stickers on his bike.�
The spandex wearin� Huff
& Puff crews love that, especially when I toot the horn
on my way past.� Sometimes I rap Beastie Boys and squeak the
horns in tune.� �I did
it like this, I did it like that, I
did it with a wiffle ball bat sooooooooo�.�� Good
times, good times.�
So,
that�s it, sorry there are no pictures of us but Jen was in
the shower (that�s why there�s no pictures of the main bathroom)
and I don�t know how to use the timer on my camera.�
So, hope you liked seeing our zoo.