Big Bang Theory Sound - Big Bang Theory Audio Clips

Dr. Odd

Recent thought:

Big Bang Theory Sound

Big Bang Theory Quote
Big Bang Theory Audio Clips
Big Bang Theory WAVs
Big Bang Theory Sound Bites

Sheldon: Typical Sheldon.

"God bless you, Google Street View Registered Trademark." - Howard Wolowitz

Howard and Rajesh: Anything? Actually, I was just checking my e-mail.

Penny: We could only communicate through a time traveling mailbox.

Don't celebrate Festival of Saturnalia

Embarrassing moments

Sheldon & Penny: I was going to get my mail. Are you hoping to get it telepathically?

Leonard: You changed the address? What about mail?

Given obligation

Google street view

Isaac Newton Born

"You really didn't like it, Sheldon? –No, on the contrary. I-I found the Grinch to be a relatable, engaging character. And I was really with him right up to the point that he succumbed to social convention and returned the presents and saved Christmas. What a buzz-kill that was." - Penny, Sheldon Cooper

"I wouldn't say 'amazing.' At best, it's a modest leap-forward from the basic technology that gave us Country Bear Jamboree - Sheldon Cooper

"I don't think that's going to happen, Sheldon. –No one ever does. That's why it happens." - Leonard Hofstadter, Sheldon Cooper

Penny: Hey, hi. This came for you today.

"Now I'm not familiar with the acronym 'KMN.' –Oh. From the context, we think it means 'Kill me now.'" - Sheldon Cooper, Johnny Galecki, Leonard Hofstadter

"My body and I have a relationship that works best when we maintain a cool, wary distance from each other." - Sheldon Cooper

"I need an orderly with a wheelchair. I got a robot hand grasping a man's penis out here." - Althea

Sheldon Penny: Soft Kitty

Sheldon: Be sure to check the mail. Open the mail!

"Wow. Humongous man-crush, dude. –Yep, it's officially a bro-mance." - Rajnesh Koothrappali, Howard Wolowitz

"You know me to be a very smart man. Don't you think if I were wrong, I'd know it?" - Sheldon Cooper

"I sense that's not sincere, although I have no idea why." - Sheldon Cooper

"December 25th, 1642, Julian calendar, Sir Isaac Newton is born. Jesus, on the other hand, was actually born in the summer. His birthday was moved to coincide with the traditional Pagan holiday that celebrated the Winter Solstice with lit fires and slaughtered goats. Which, frankly, sounds like more fun than 12 hours of church with my mother followed by a fruitcake. –Merry Newtonmas, everyone!" - Sheldon Cooper, Johnny Galecki (Leonard Hofstadter

"When we watch Frosty The Snowman he roots for the sun. –Excuse me, but the sun is essential for all life on Earth. Frosty is merely a bit of frozen, supernatural ephemera and a stolen hat. A crime, by the way, for which he is never brought to account." - Leonard Hofstadter, Sheldon Cooper

"Oh, I always tear-up when the Grinch's heart grows three sizes. –Tears seem appropriate. Enlargement of the heart muscle, or hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, is a serious disease which could lead to congestive heart failure. –Fa-la-la la-la-la la la la." - Penny, Sheldon Cooper, Johnny Galecki (Leonard Hofstadter

"It's OK, you don't have to give me anything in return. –Of course I do. The essence of custom is that I now have to go out and purchase for you a gift of commencerat value and representing the same perceived level of friendship as that represented by the gift you've given me. It's no wonder suicide rates skyrocket this time of year." - Penny, Sheldon Cooper

"I got you and Leonard a few silly neighbor-gifts, so I'll just put them under my tree. –Wait! You bought me a present? –Uh-huh. –But why would you do such a thing? –I don't know, 'cause it's Christmas? –Oh, Penny! I know you think you're being generous, but the foundation of gift-giving is reciprocity. You haven't given me a gift. You've given me an obligation." - Penny, Sheldon Cooper

"I'm not crazy. My mother had me tested." - Sheldon Cooper

"Man, call 'spoiler alert' before you say things like that." - Rajnesh Koothrappali

"I'm quite aware of the way humans usually reproduce, which is messy, unsanitary, and based on living next to you for three years involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity. –Oh, god. –Yes, exactly." - Sheldon Cooper, Penny

"I'm guessing that future historians will condemn us for not taking this opportunity to kill Sheldon." - Howard Wolowitz

"And you don't think I can achieve the required intimacy via text-messaging? –Probably not. –Huh. Well, it appears that the phone companies have been lying to me." - Sheldon Cooper, Penny

"I thought you broke up with her. Why is she here?" - Sheldon Cooper

Sheldon: It's a Trap

"Excuse me. Wolverine Origin, mini-series issue 2, page 22: retractable bone claws. If you people spent less time thinking about sex and more time concentrating on comic books we'd have far fewer of these embarrassing moments." - Sheldon Cooper

"I wonder what the non-pathetic people are doing tonight?" - Rajnesh Koothrappali

"Well, if I may profer a suggestion. In bars, all across this great nation of ours, Thursday night is Ladies Night. Which means as the evening progresses we will get better looking courtesy of 99 cent margaritas and 2-for-1 Jell-O shots." - Howard Wolowitz

"Come on, you know I can't come-on to women unless I'm lit up like the Hindu Festival of Diwali." - Rajnesh Koothrappali

"Removing Joe Chill as the killer of Batman's parents effectively deprived him of his raison d'être. –OK, you can throw all the French around you want, it doesn't make you right. –Au contraire." - Sheldon Cooper, Stuart

Sheldon: Knock Leonard

"I told you before, bears are terrifying." - Sheldon Cooper

Always do overs

Appropriate metaphor

Bears terrifying

"I believe the appropriate metaphor here involved a river of excrement and a Native American water vessel without any means of propulsion." - Sheldon Cooper

"I'll tell you what, how about we go 'Rock-Paper-Scissors'? –Ew, I don't think so. No. Anecdotal evidence suggests that in a game of 'Rock-Paper-Scissors', players familiar with each other will tie 75 to 80% of the time due to the limited number of outcomes. I suggest 'Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lizard-Spock'. –What? –Oh, it's very simple. Look, Scissors cuts Paper. Paper covers Rock. Rock crushes Lizard. Lizard poisons Spock. Spock smashes Scissors. Scissors decapitates Lizard. Lizard eats Paper. Paper disproves Spock. Spock vaporizes Rock. And as it always has, Rock crushes Scissors." - Rajnesh Koothrappali, Sheldon Cooper

"Hey, buddy. What brings you to my little slice of hell?" - Howard Wolowitz

"That doesn't count! Do over! Do over! –There are no 'do-overs' in Wii Bowling. –There are always do-overs when my People play sports." - Howard Wolowitz, Sheldon Cooper

"Pathetic. All of you: completely pathetic! (door slams)" - Penny

"Where were you that's more important than Wii Bowling night? –Actually, I was-- –It's a rhetorical question. There is nothing more important than Wii Bowling night." - Sheldon Cooper, Johnny Galecki (Leonard Hofstadter

"What're you looking at? You've never seen a hypocrite before?" - Leonard Hofstadter

"Ooh, Sheldon, I'm afraid you couldn't be more wrong. –More wrong? 'Wrong' is an absolute state and not subject to gradation. –Of course it is. It's a little wrong to say a tomato is a vegetable. It's very wrong to say it's a suspension bridge." - Stuart, Sheldon Cooper

"You're joking. –I'm a horny engineer, Leonard. I never joke about math or sex." - Leonard Hofstadter, Howard Wolowitz

"Come on, Howard, the odds of us picking up girls in a bar are practically zero. –OK, really? Are you familiar with the Drake Equation? –The one that estimates the odds of making contact with extraterrestrials by calculating the product of an increasingly restrictive series of fractional values such as those stars and planets, and those planets likely to develop life: N = R* × ƒ_p × n_e × ƒ_l × ƒ_i × ƒ_c × L? –Yeah. That one." - Leonard Hofstadter, Howard Wolowitz, Sheldon Cooper

"Saturnalia? –Gather 'round, kids. It's time for Sheldon's Beloved Christmas Special. –In the pre-Christian era, as the Winter Solstice approached and the plants died, pagans brought evergreen boughs into their homes as an act of sympathetic magick intended to guard the life essences of the plants until spring. This custom was later appropriated by northern Europeans and eventually it becomes the so-called Christmas tree. –And that, Charlie Brown, is what boredom is all about." - Penny, Howard Wolowitz, Sheldon Cooper

"Leonard, look! Sheldon's hugging me! –It's a Saturnalia miracle!" - Penny, Johnny Galecki, Leonard Hofstadter

"Hey, Sheldon, are you and Leonard putting up a Christmas tree? –No. Because we don't celebrate the ancient pagan festival of Saturnalia." - Penny, Sheldon Cooper

"Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken. –Yeah? Well your Ken can kiss my Barbie." - Sheldon Cooper, Penny

Rock paper scissors lizard spock

Saturnalia miracle

"Oh, honey, the buses don't go where you live, do they?" - Penny

"I'm sorry, but I'm not going to watch the Clone Wars TV series until I've seen the Clone Wars movie. I prefer to let George Lucas disappoint me in the order he intended." - Sheldon Cooper

Never seen hypocrite

Non-pathetic people

"Are you joking? Star Trek V is the standard against which all badness is measured!" - Rajnesh Koothrappali

Nothing more important

Officially bro-mance

"OK. For the record, what you guys are doing is really creepy. –You know what? If it's creepy to use the Internet, military satellites, and robot aircraft to find a house full of gorgeous young models so that I can drop in on them unexpectedly, then fine. I'm creepy." - Leonard Hofstadter, Howard Wolowitz

"Oh, uh, Penny, you don't want to get into it with Sheldon. The guy is one lab accident away from being a super-villain." - Leonard Hofstadter

"Oh, come on. Everybody loves LOLcats. They're cute and they can't spell… 'cause they're cats. –I trusted you with my email address, and you betrayed that trust by sending me internet banalities. Strike one." - Penny, Sheldon Cooper

Big-Bang-Theory-Sound